JOY

"I've got that joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart, down in my heart to stay". I found myself singing this tonight as I drove down the freeway and just as I did I looked up to see I was passing by Joy Road. Joy is the fruit of the Holy Spirit that Adam and I are focusing on this month. Today I found myself really tested in regards to this virtue. Yesterday we put an offer on a house. CRAZY. Three days ago we were arguing about moving and I said I wouldn't be ready for a long time, and then that night I found the perfect house online. Visiting it we fell in love. It seemed to have everything we wanted. It was simple, had an acre of land surrounded by woods, a barn for Adam to fix up, a playground and a garden. Plus it was within our price range. Our realtor thought despite three other offers that we would get it, but this afternoon we found out someone had put in a higher offer. This past week in my women's group we discussed "deny". Like "deny yourself, take up your cross and follow me" type "deny". Fr. John Riccardo says that this doesn't mean dying to one's self but rather completely giving one's life over to God. I try to do this time and time again, yet I find that I still hold back things from the Lord. I go to him as my consultant rather than as my Lord. Lord, Adam and I are trying to surrender to you. I thought we did. I thought we gave this whole "finding a house" thing over to you, but it turns out I was still trying to be in control. I thought this house was perfect for us, but I have to trust that you have something greater planned. As I drove home from my parents tonight, tears streamed down my face as the reality of losing what I thought was to become our home hit me. But then I remembered it-JOY. Lord, why do I live if not for you, what else is there in this life if not YOU? You are my joy. No matter what the circumstances are, I have cause to rejoice. So I sang in that car and Colette squealed along with me. "And if the devil doesn't like it he can sit on a tack"